Have you ever felt like you’re just faking it until you make it?

You’ve probably heard that advice a hundred times:

Put on confidence you don’t feel. Act like you have it all together. Pretend until you finally arrive at “real” success someday.

But “faking it til you make it” makes you feel like an imposter in your own life.

You disqualify your current achievements because you don’t look perfect from every angle.

This rule teaches you that what you’re doing right now doesn’t count as “real” success.

You’re just faking it until you reach some mythical finish line.

And I’m here to tell you: that’s a lie.

You’re not faking it. You’re making it.

Why “Faking It” Backfires

Here’s what the research shows:

When we try to prove ourselves to others, we end up focusing on our own weaknesses.

A study published in the Journal of Consumer Research found that “faking it” actually makes us miserable.

It not only makes us feel more stressed and anxious, it chips away at our confidence because we’re so aware of our “fakeness” and are scared that others will find out.

In other words, the very thing we’re told will help us succeed is actually working against us.

What Self-Doubt Actually Costs

When you’re doubting yourself, you’re not just having negative thoughts. You’re losing time and energy that could go somewhere else.

You complete something you’re proud of, but instead of moving forward, you spin. You second-guess. You wonder if it’s good enough.

Or maybe you don’t even try because you’re waiting to feel more qualified, more ready, more “successful.”

All that mental energy could have gone into your work. Your relationships. Your life.

The Years I Wasted

I know this because I lived it.

For years, I told myself that I was faking it in my business. That everyone else was doing something better than I was. That I wasn’t as smart, not as capable.

The truth? I’m really good at what I do.

But because building my business sometimes looked a little messy, I couldn’t see the success I was already living.

The Damage “Faking It” Causes

But it took me years to see it that way.

For most of my career, I believed the lie. And that belief cost me.

It cost me time. It cost me energy. It cost me opportunities I never even considered taking because I didn’t think I was good enough.

What could I have achieved if I’d recognized I was already making it instead of faking it?

I’ll never know. And that’s what makes it such a waste.

The Shift

So when did I stop faking it?

When I looked at what I’d built and said: Wait a minute. This is the real deal.

Not because everything was perfect, but because I recognized that all my grit, all my perseverance – it created something real.

Every time I figured something out. Every risk I took. Every moment I chose to keep going.

That wasn’t faking it. That was making it.

(This is one of three money rules I had to break to build a business that set me free. You can read about all three rules here.)

And the same is true for you.

As We Head Into a New Year

As we head deeper into 2026, I want you to do something:

Look back at 2025. Not at what went wrong, but at what went well, even the things that didn’t feel successful at the time.

What challenges did you face? What did you figure out? What moments did you keep going when it would have been easier to quit?

Write down three things, then ask yourself: Was I faking it during those moments? Or was I making it?

Here’s what I’ve learned: You’re making it. Right now. Even when it feels messy.

Stop waiting for permission to recognize what you’ve already built.

You’re the real deal, right now, as you are.